St. Patrick's Day Medley

After a year without it, primary is returning to my neck of the woods this Sunday. It will include plenty of social distancing and safety protocols, but it is finally happening! And just in time for some clever primary music chorister to put together this particular medley. Come on, people, make it happen!

Follow the Prophet

"Follow the Prophet" is one of our family's favorite primary songs. Although given the mortal end of a number of the prophets, I can see why the song would take on a more ominous meaning if it was interpreted literally rather than figuratively.

Singing Time Mistake

Sunday marks eight years of this blog! When I started it, I worried if I would be able to come up with enough material for a couple of weeks. (Truth be told, I still worry if I'll be able to come up with enough material for a couple of more weeks.) One of my greatest pleasures with this website is getting to know you, my readers.

I sincerely appreciate every email message and comment left on a post. I read them all. I cherish them all. Your kind words inspire me to keep going. I feel like we're starting to develop a real community here. Thanks!

Now that the blog has reached the age of accountability, I guess that means that the jokes are going to have to grow up too. No more sophomoric humor. No more immature little gags. This website has grown up and so have I!

(Okay, maybe one more immature gag.)

Overcrowded Primary Program

It's that time of year! There is rarely a better sacrament meeting than the primary program. It can make for an overcrowded rostrum, though.

Opening Exercises

I love the idea of this 1980s aerobics instructor patiently waiting 30 years for a chance to run opening exercises. I just want to know if she's ever asked back.

Primary Presentation

As I've had it explained to me, a ward's budget is calculated through some combination of sacrament attendance and the size of a ward's young men, young women, and primary. As far as sacrament attendance goes, wards--like television shows--have sweeps weeks. Attendance for the sacrament meetings in the third month of each quarter are counted and submitted to Church headquarters. Thus if you're going to have a meeting consisting of two outgoing missionaries and one returning missionary,* you'd better hope it falls in the month of March, June, September, or December.**

Ironically, the primary presentation (which is one of the biggest attended sacrament meetings of the year) seldom falls on a counting month. Most wards hold them in November. Perhaps this is why a desperate bishopric might be tempted to look to schedule an additional three primary presentations in a year.***

*Like our ward did.

**It did.

***Don't worry, Primary Presidents, the church handbook prohibits any such shenanigans--it clearly spells out that there shall be one presentation per year held during the fourth quarter of that year.

Mormon Crickets

Sometimes there is something to be said for not using an object lesson.